I'm Competitive At Everything.

I Always Thought I Was Going To Die Before I Was 60.

Oh, You Hate Your Job? Why Didn't You Say So? There's A Support Group For That. It's Called Everybody, And They Meet At The Bar.

Vegas Is Everything That's Right With America. You Can Do Whatever You Want, 24 Hours A Day. They've Effectively Legalized Everything There.

In Any Other Job, They're Truck Drivers. In Show-biz, They're Transportation Captains.

Every Election I Have To Hold My Nose To Vote.