If You Have Something Important

In America, You Break Law. In Soviet Russia, Law Breaks You! In America, You Watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother Watch You!

I Was Not Only Typecast As A Russian, But I Was Typecast As Yakov Smirnoff. This Is Understandable, And I Was Very Happy To Get The Roles, But It Would Be Nice To Be In A Movie Where I Could Be Someone Else.

I Believe There Is A Direct Correlation Between Love And Laughter.

I Fed My Ego, But Not My Soul.

In America, You Assassinate President. In Soviet Russia, President Assassinate You!