If I Get Big Laughs,

When I Wasn't Working, I Put The Blame Directly Where It Belonged - I Blamed My Agent. When I Didn't Have An Agent, I Spent Time Looking For A New Agent So I Would Have Somebody To Blame.

You Can't Help Getting Older, But You Don't Have To Get Old.

Happiness? A Good Cigar, A Good Meal, A Good Cigar And A Good Woman - Or A Bad Woman; It Depends On How Much Happiness You Can Handle.

I Did Go To School - My Kind Of School. When I Was A Kid I Went Out ... And You Meet People. You Talk To Them. Anybody Says Something That Makes Sense, It Stays With You, Rubs Off On You. That Kind Of School.

Fall In Love With What You're Going To Do For A Living. To Be Able To Get Out Of Bed And Do What You Love To Do For The Rest Of The Day Is Beyond Words. I'd Rather Be A Failure In Something I Love Than Be Successful In Something I Hate.