If I Could Control The

A Refrigerator Is The Opposite Of A Drug Addict, Because A Refrigerator Starts In A Box And Then Moves To A House.

I Think Hair Gel Was Invented To Make It Easier To Identify Assholes From A Distance.

I Used To Play Sports. Then I Realized You Can Buy Trophies. Now I Am Good At Everything.

A Lifevest Protects You From Drowning And A Bulletproof Vest Protects You From Getting Shot, And A Sweater Vest Protects You From Pretty Girls.

Yes" Actually Means "no" 100% Of The Time, When The Question Is "can I Give You Some Advice?