I Was The Last Girl

Don't Talk To Me About Gravity. When I Get Out Of Bed In The Morning, I Have To Be Careful Not To Step On My Breasts.

No More Botox For Me. Betty White's Bowels Move More Than My Face.

Mel Gibson's Father Doesn't Think There Was A Holocaust? Great. I Don't Think There's A Movie. We're Even.

The Psychic Scars Caused By Believing That You Are Ugly Leave A Permanent Mark On Your Personality.

My Routines Come Out Of Total Unhappiness. My Audiences Are My Group Therapy.