I Used To Do Drugs,

Sometimes It's Hard To Tell If A Joke Is Working Or Not For The First Couple Of Minutes.

I'm A Joke Comic. I Tell Jokes. I Like Writing A Joke, And I Like When A Joke Works, And I Like Other Comics Who Tell Jokes.

Women Have All The Power Because Women Have All The Vaginas.

Even Now, As We Speak, People Are Having Sex With Animals. And We Wonder Why The Animals Attack Us.

Aspirin Will Not Bring Dead Hookers Back To Life.