I Think People Tend To

The Mistake That People Make In Stand-up Is Thinking They're Profound Or They're Deep When There Are So Many People Who Have More Worthwhile Ways Of Phrasing Things.

I'm Just Another Guy Who Thinks He's Smarter Than He Is, In A Long Line Of Them.

My Stand-up Act? I Combine The Fact That The World Is A Violent Place With The Fact That Each Person Is Responsible For The Situation They Are In.

New York Stat Agreed To Pay $12 Million To Settle A Lawsuit Filed Three Decades Ago By Inmates Swept Up In The Bloody 1971 Revolt At Attica Prison. The Settlement Will Be Paid In The Form Of Chocolate Bars And Packs Of Newports That Can Be Picked Up In The Commissary.

I Get The Impression The English Kings Were Witty, For Some Reason. I Feel Like All You Had Was Your Wit.