I Tell Ya, It's Tough

I Am The World's Oldest Teenager. I've Never Lost My Youthful Attitude.

One Time My Whole Family Played Hide And Seek. They Found My Mother In Pittsburgh!

I'm Getting So Old My Insurance Company Sends Me 1/2 A Calendar!

When I Was Forty, I Was Getting Divorced, Living In A Low-class, Dirty Hotel In New York. My Mother Was Dying Of Cancer. I Owed $20,000. That Was About The Lowest. I Came Back To Show Business, And I Couldn't Get A Job. I Was Turned Down By Every Small-time Agent In New York.

I Asked My Wife, 'is There Somebody Else?' She Said, 'there Must Be.'