I'm Getting So Old My

If Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beholder, So Is Ugliness.

Getting Older Is Tough. I Remember The Last Time I Felt An Erection. It Was At The Movies. The Only Trouble Is, It Belonged To The Guy Sitting Next To Me.

When My Wife Drives, There's Always Trouble. The Other Day She Took The Car. She Came Home. She Told Me, There's Water In The Carburetor. I Asked Her, Where's The Car? She Said, In A Lake.

Time And Tide And Hookers Wait For No Man.

I Told My Kids, "someday, You'll Have Kids Of Your Own." One Of Them Said, "so Will You."