I Like To Think Of

My Mom Was Always Someone Who If, Even Now, I Say I Met A Certain Famous Person, She Always Says, "she's Married To So And So!"

The First Time I Did Stand-up Was The Summer I Was 17.

Dear America, When You Tell Gay Americans That They Can't Serve Their Country Openly Or Marry The Person That They Love, You're Telling That To Kids Too. So Don't Be F**king Shocked And Wonder Where All These Bullies Are Coming From That Are Torturing Young Kids And Driving Them To Kill Themselves Because They're Different; They Learned It From Watching You.

I Don't Get This Shitty Attitude That Only Gays Should Care About Gay Issues And Only Women Should Care About Women's Issues.

I'm A Total One-hour Drama Addict. I Think When You're A Comedian, You Tend Towards Dramas Because That's The Less Stressful Thing To Watch.