I Know What I Wish

If You Have Formed The Habit Of Checking On Every New Diet That Comes Along, You Will Find That, Mercifully, They All Blur Together, Leaving You With Only One Definite Piece Of Information: French-fried Potatoes Are Out.

I Will Read Anything Rather Than Work.

Oh, Wouldn't It Be Wonderful If Some Manufacturer Would Make A Toy As Tough, As Staunch, As Hard To Crack Open As The Carton It Comes In!

I Don't Want To See The Uncut Version Of Anything.

Confronted By An Absolutely Infuriating Review, It Is Sometimes Helpful For The Victim To Do A Little Personal Research On The Critic. Is There Any Truth To The Rumor That He Had No Formal Education Beyond The Age Of Eleven? In Any Event, Is He Able To Construct A Simple English Sentence? Do His Participles Dangle? When Moved To Lyricism, Does He Write "i Had A Fun Time"? Was He Ever Arrested For Burglary? I Don't Know That You Will Prove Anything This Way, But It Is Perfectly Harmless And Quite Soothing.