I Haven't Spoken To My

When I Was Forty, I Was Getting Divorced, Living In A Low-class, Dirty Hotel In New York. My Mother Was Dying Of Cancer. I Owed $20,000. That Was About The Lowest. I Came Back To Show Business, And I Couldn't Get A Job. I Was Turned Down By Every Small-time Agent In New York.

A Man In The Crowd Asks: Hey Rodney, How'd You Get Started? Rodney: I Was 12 Years Old, Alone In My Room, And I Got Started!

I Said To A Girl I'd Been Seeing, Come Home With Me, Honey, And I'll Show You Where It's At. She Said, You'd Better, Because The Last Time I Could'nt Find It.

I Feel Sorry For Short People, You Know. When It Rains, They're The Last To Know.

What A Kid I Got, I Told Him About The Birds And The Bee And He Told Me About The Butcher And My Wife.