Hey, Guess Who's Gay? The

Delta: We Never Make The Same Mistake Three Times.

Child Labor, Not A Problem. Censorship, Not A Problem. Torture, Not A Problem. Chewing Gum In China - Oh, My God! You Better Not Be Over Here Chewing Gum.

Earlier Today, We Got A Call From Stephen Hawking. He's A Genius, And After 6,028 Shows He Ran The Numbers And He Said It Works Out To About Eight Minutes Of Laughter.

According To The Rand Mcnally Places-rated Almanac, The Best Place To Live In America Is The City Of Pittsburgh. The City Of New York Came In Twenty-fifth. Here In New York We Really Don't Care Too Much. Because We Know That We Could Beat Up Their City Anytime.

Did You See Howard Dean Ranting And Raving? Here's A Little Tip Howard - Cut Back On The Red Bull.