Here's A Thought For Sweat

As An Adult, I'm Not Supposed To Go Down Slides. So If I'm At The Top Of A Slide, I Have To Pretend That I Got There Accidentally. "how The Hell Did I Get Up Here? I Guess I Have To Slide Down. Whee!" That's What You Say When You're Having Fun. You Refer To Yourself And Some Other People.

I Had A Paper Route When I Was A Kid. I Was Supposed To Go To 2,000 Houses. Or Two Dumpsters.

I Used To Drink Wine. This Girl Asked Me, "doesn't Wine Give You A Headache?" "yeah, Eventually, But The First And The Middle Part Are Amazing!"

This Product That Was On Tv Was Available For Four Easy Payments Of $19.95. I Would Like A Product That Was Available For Three Easy Payments And One Complicated Payment. We Can't Tell You Which Payment It Is, But One Of These Payments Is Going To Be Hard. The Mailman Will Get Shot, The Envelope Will Not Seal, The Stamp Will Be In The Wrong Denomination. The Final Payment Must Be Made In Wampum.

I Saw A Seagull Hanging Out By A Lake, But I Said, "don't Worry, Dude. I Won't Say Anything."