Hell, When I Was In

You Just May Be A Redneck If Your Lawn Furniture Used To Be Your Living Room Furniture.

I Actually Had A Chance To Be In Delta Farce, But I Couldn't Do It Because I Read The Script.

If You Ever Start Feeling Like You Have The Goofiest, Craziest, Most Dysfunctional Family In The World, All You Have To Do Is Go To A State Fair. Because Five Minutes At The Fair, You'll Be Going, 'you Know, We're Alright. We Are Dang Near Royalty.'

If Your Neighbors Think You're A Detective Because A Cop Always Brings You Home, You Might Be A Redneck.

I Hope Someday We Can Stamp Out Illiteracy In America. Of Course You'll Have To Kill Alot Of My Relatives To Do It.