Have You Ever Heard One

Relations Between The Sexes Are So Complicated That The Only Way You Can Tell If Members Of The Set Are Going Together Is If They Are Married. Then, Almost Certainly, They Are Not.

Opera Is Like A Husband With A Foreign Title: Expensive To Support, Hard To Understand, And Therefore A Supreme Social Challenge.

People Ask Me What Makes A Good Funeral, And I Tell Them The Most Important Thing Is Your Man In The Casket. If You Have A Man Of Substance In There, You Have The Makings Of A First-class Funeral.

To Anyone Who Has Ever Been Owned By A Cat, It Will Come As No Surprise That There Are All Sorts Of Things About Your Cat You Will Never, As Long As You Live, Forget. Not The Least Of These Is Your First Sight Of Him Or Her.

What This World Needs Is A New Kind Of Army - The Army Of The Kind.