Clinton Said He Feels Safe

Our Top Story, In 'threat Matrix Reloaded' News ... Attorney General John Ashcroft And Fbi Director Robert Muller Held A Press Conference Today To Announce That Al Qaeda Is Planning Attacks Somewhere Inside The United States At Sometime In The Future. So Go About Your Normal Lives, But With A Vague Sense Of Foreboding.

The Election Is In Full-swing. Republicans Have Taken Out Round-the-clock Ads Promoting George Bush. Don't We Already Have That? It's Called Fox News.

President Bush Is In The Hot Seat Over Iraqi Pre-war Intelligence. Remember The Good Ol' Days When The Only Thing The President Was Trying To Cover Up Was A Stain?

I Enjoyed Retirement The Right Way Linguine Con Vongole, Red Wine And Plenty Of Truffle Cheese.

It's Weird Watching President Bush Struggle With Excuses For Why We Went To War. As He Struggles, It Reminds Us All What A Terrific Liar Bill Clinton Really Was.