Or As Hockey Player Sergei

You May Have Heard This, That Nasa Discovered Water On Mars When He Heard About The Water On Mars, President Bush Said, 'is It Regular Or Unleaded?'

The Prison Scandal Is Really Hurting President Bush's Poll Numbers. In Fact, I Hear He's Already Working On His Concession Smirk.

Apparently, Six Women Claim That Arnold Schwarzenegger Groped Them While Working On His Movies. Hats Off To These Women Who Admit They Worked On Arnold's Movies.

Saddam Hussein Is About To Face Trial And George Bush Wants To Execute Him. Not Because Of The War Crimes, But Because Saddam Is Beating Him In The Polls.

With Iraq Plunging Into Chaos And Gas Prices At Record Highs President Bush Took Time Out This Weekend For A Ride On His Bicycle, But Unfortunately He Fell Off And Sustained Cuts To His Face And Hands. Apparently Bush Was Distracted By The Enormous Responsibilities Of The Presidency. I'm Just Kidding. He Hit Some Gravel Or Something.