Or As Hockey Player Sergei

In Louisiana, President Bush Met With Over 15,000 National Guard Troops. Here's The Weird Part, Nobody Remembers Seeing Him There.

Hillary Clinton's 506-page Memoir Has Come Out. So Much Of Her Personality Shines Through, That In The End, You, Too, Will Want To Sleep With An Intern.

Comedy Doesn't Always Have To Come From A Dark Place.

George W. Bush Even Stopped In Pennsylvania To Try His Hand At The Lotto And Gave Up When He Could Only Think Of The Numbers 4 And 17

Our Top Story, In 'threat Matrix Reloaded' News ... Attorney General John Ashcroft And Fbi Director Robert Muller Held A Press Conference Today To Announce That Al Qaeda Is Planning Attacks Somewhere Inside The United States At Sometime In The Future. So Go About Your Normal Lives, But With A Vague Sense Of Foreboding.