As A Comic, You Learn

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Momma Calls You Over To Help, Cause She Has A Flat Tire On Her House.

If You Can't Remember The Last Time You Had Sex With A Woman, You're Either Gay, Or Married.

I Got My Wife A Mood Ring. It Works Real Good! When Shes In A Good Mood It Turns Blue, But When Shes In A Bad Mood Theres A Red Mark Across My Forehead

There's A Whole Segment Of The Population With A Mentality That Bases Good Times On Where They Can Go And What They Can Buy.

My Whole Career Can Be Summed Up With 'ignorance Is Bliss.' When You Do Not Know Better, You Do Not Really Worry About Failing.