As A Comic, You Learn

You Might Be A Redneck If Three Quarters Of The Clothes You Own Have Logos On Them.

You Might Be A Redneck If On Your First Date You Had To Ask Your Dad To Borrow The Keys To The Tractor.

Some People Like To Keep Their Grass Cut Really Short, So They Can See The Intruders Coming. Keep Those Kill Zones Open. I Say Let The Grass Grow Tall So They Don't Know There's A House Behind It. Some Call It Lazy, I Say It's Thinking.

You Just May Be A Redneck If Your Lawn Furniture Used To Be Your Living Room Furniture.

You Might Be A Redneck If Going To The Bathroom Involves Shoes And A Flashlight.