An Adult Western Is Where

My Wife Sent Me A Valentine Card That Said, "take My Heart, Take My Lips, Take My Soul." That's Just Like Her. She Kept The Good Parts For Herself.

I Don't Worry Too Much About Sex Education In The Schools. If The Kids Learn It Like They Do Everything Else, They Won't Know How.

They've Got Plastic Christmas Trees Now. They're Hard To Tell From The Real Aluminum Ones.

A Man Is Hit By A Car While Crossing A Beverly Hills Street. A Woman Rushes To Him And Cradles His Head In Her Lap, Asking, Are You Comfortable? The Man Answers, I Make A Nice Living.

I Like To Think Of Myself As The Middleman Between Fred Allen And Henny Youngman.