After We Made Love He

I Said To My Husband, 'my Boobs Have Gone, My Stomach's Gone, Say Something Nice About My Legs.' He Said, 'blue Goes With Everything.'

Looking 50 Is Great, If You're 60.

I Was So Flat I Used To Put Xs On My Chest And Write, 'you Are Here.' I Wore Angora Sweaters Just So The Guys Would Have Something To Pet.

I Hate Mcdonald's. I Don't Want To Order My Dinner By Yelling Into A Clown's Mouth. If I Want My Face In A Clown's Mouth, I'll Tongue Kiss Glenn Beck.

There's Always An Adjective Before My Name, And It's Never A Nice One.