A Man Is Only As

Welcome To The 77th And Last Oscars.

There Are Only Three Things Women Need In Life: Food, Water, And Compliments.

Why Do People Do Yoga? To Clear Their Minds? I Embrace The Clutter In My Head.

Being A Comedian Is A Lot Like Being An Athlete. If You're Carl Lewis And You're The Fastest, Then No Matter What You're The Fastest.

I Was Raised To Believe That You Had To Do Things Better Than White People In Order To Succeed. The Old Black Shows Were Better Than The White Shows. "the Jeffersons" (1975) Was A Lot Better. "good Times" (1974) Was Way Funnier. "sanford And Son" (1972). Now, Though, Everyone Thinks We're Equal, So We Submit The Same Shit That Everyone Else Submits. And Then We Get Mad When They Won't Air It. You Got To Go Back To The Old Attitude Of It Has To Be Twice As Good.