Your Parents Put A Curse

Fatherhood Is Telling Your Daughter That Michael Jackson Loves All His Fans, But Has Special Feelings For The Ones Who Eat Broccoli.

The Most Important Educational Vehicle In All Life Is A Parent Figure.

I Guess The Real Reason That My Wife And I Had Children Is The Same Reason That Napoleon Had For Invading Russia: It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time.

We Go Out Of Our Way To Make People So Different,... To Punish Them Because Of Color, Because Of Sex, Because Of Size, And The Game Starts.

The Mother May Be Doing Ninety Percent Of The Disciplining, But The Father Still Must Have A Full-time Acceptance Of All The Children. He Never Must Say, "get These Kids Out Of Here; I'm Trying To Watch Tv." If He Ever Does Start Saying This, He Is Liable To See One Of His Kids On The Six O'clock News.