You Might Be A Redneck

I'll Just Have Itchy, Watery Eyes!

I Have Never Been Jealous. Not Even When My Dad Finished Fifth Grade A Year Before I Did.

The Thing About That Singles Apartment Is You Never Had To Clean It Up... Until The Day You Got The Security Deposit Back. You're Arguing With The Landlord... 'no Sir, The Back Door Was Missing When We Moved In Here! The Pizzas Were Always On The Ceiling!'

If Your Working Television Sits On Top Of Your Non-working Television, You Might Be A Redneck.

You Might Be A Redneck If...your Belt Buckle Weighs More Than Three Pounds.