You Live By The Cake,

Being On Tv Sucks. It's A Lot Of Work. You Memorize Scripts And Then You Show Up And They Change Everything. I'm A Control Freak. When I'm Doing Stand-up, I Say What I Want And Then I Get Instant Feedback.

I Drink Diet Coke So I Can Eat Regular Cake.

You Can't Be Bad Ass In A Car That Kills Gas Like I Kill Tacos.

You Live By The Cake, You Die By The Cake.

Every Night, It's A Bakery On The Bus. It's A Curse, Because I Talk About How Much I Love Cake, People Bring Me Cake. And Now I Just Found Out I'm Diabetic, So I'm Like, Are You Kidding Me?!