You Can't Think The Thoughts

You Can't Have Anything Valuable In Your House. Niggers Will Break In And Take It All! Everything White People Don't Like About Black People, Black People Don't Like About Black People. It's Like Our Own Personal Civil War. On One Side, There's Black People. On The Other, You've Got Niggers. The Niggers Have Got To Go. I Love Black People, But I Hate Niggers. I Am Tired Of Niggers. Tired, Tired, Tired.

If Poor People Knew How Rich Rich People Are, There Would Be Riots In The Streets.

Only Married People Understand You Can Be Miserable And Happy At The Same Time.

Anyone Who Makes Up Their Mind About An Issue Before They Hear The Issue Is A Fool.

The Thing I Try To Get Across To The Writers - And I Do A Lot Of Writing, Too - Is That When I Do Stand-up, Nothing I Talk About Is Funny. Everything Is Really Sad And Tragic And Then I Make It Funny.