You Can Always Tell When

When Yer In A Funk, People In Love Are A Royal Pain In The Patookus.

I've Got Big Feet, So Filling Someone Else's Big Shoes Doesn't Scare Me.

My Father Can Not Finish A Sentence. When We Were Kids He Would Go, 'girls The Most Important Thing In Life To Remember Is...' 'daddy, What Is It?' 'what's What, Honey?' 'the Most Important Thing In Life To Remember.' 'oh, What's That?'

I Remember I Was So Crabby In My Third Trimester - I Got Gestational Diabetes Because I'd Been Acting Like I Was In A One-woman Pie-eating Contest.

It's So Easy To Judge Everybody And For Some Reason Extra Weight Is The One Thing Everything Feels Ok To Joke About.