Whenever I Meet A Pretty

If I Tell A Joke On Stage And The Crowd Laughs For A Minute, I Stand There For A Minute And Enjoy Them Laughing Before I Go On To The Next Joke. On Tv, If I Stand There For A Minute While They Laugh, I Look Like An Idiot Who Can't Remember The Next Joke.

I Like The Idea Of Being The Funny Guy In The Dramatic Thing, Playing A Hit Man With A Weird Sense Of Humor.

I Was Always Fascinated By Forbidden Things People Didn't Want To Talk About, Like Death.

Racist Dermatologists Think All Black People Have Really Bad Skin.

You Know How Everybody Has That One Weird Creepy Uncle? Well, Seth Green Looks Like He Got Raped By All Of Them.