When The Hell Is Warren

[the Internet] ... Is An Amazing Communications Tool That's Bringing The Whole World Together. I Mean, You Sit Down To Sign On To America Online In Your Hometown, And It's Just Staggering To Think That At The Same Moment, Halfway Around The World, In China, Someone You've Never Met Is Sitting At Their Computer, Hearing The Exact Same Busy Signal That You're Hearing.

I'm One Of The More Pessimistic Cats On The Planet. I Make Van Gogh Look Like A Rodeo Clown.

The White House Looked Into A Plan That Would Allow Illegal Immigrants To Stay In The United States. The Plan Called For A Million Mexicans To Marry A Million Of Our Ugliest Citizens.

The Democrats Continue To Snipe At Bush. They'll Never Give It Up To Him. You Know Teddy Kennedy And Tom Daschle Pick More Nits Than A Father And Son Spider Monkey Team Who Know They're Being Followed By A National Geographic Film Crew.

I Think We Have To Help The Helpless. The Clueless? I Don't Give A Rat's Ass About The Clueless.