When I Did The Sitcom

Because Criminals Know That When They See A House With 2 Foot Tall Grass, A Dog On A Chain, And An Engine Hanging From A Tree, A Gun Lives In That House. And If You Want To Know What Kind, Just Break In At 2 In The Morning.

I Was Talking To Alan Jackson. He Had His Second Greatest Hits Album. He Said, You Don't Ever Get Into This Really Thinking You're Gonna Make It.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Think The Mountain Men In Deliverance Were Just Misunderstood.

Sacrificing Myself To Kill Hilary Clinton Was The Best Thing I Could Possibly Do For Humanity

You Might Be A Redneck If You Prominently Display A Gift You Bought At Graceland.