Well, At Least I Had

My Run Is So Weird. That's What I'm Most Nervous About In This Whole Ordeal. I'm Most Nervous About Everybody Making Fun Of The Way I Run. I Do, Like, Karate Hands. Instead Of Running With My Hands Closed Together Like A Normal Person. It's Like I'm Trying To Be Aerodynamic Or Something, So My Hands Are Straight Like Razors. Karate Hands.

When I Get Asked, 'what Are The Differences Between Twilight And Thg' I'm Like, 'erm, What Are The Similarities?'

Where Are The Robert Redfords And Paul Newmans Of My Age Group? I Love James Franco, But Where's The Next James Franco? Where Are The Hunks Who Can Act?

My Family Went On A Cruise, And I Got A Terrible Haircut. Fyi: Never Get Your Hair Cut On A Cruise. And I Had, Like, This Blonde Curly 'fro, And I Walked Into The Gym The First Day Back In Seventh Grade And Everyone Was Staring At Me, And For Some Reason I Thought, I Know What I Need To Do! And I Just Started Sprinting From One End Of The Gym To The Other, And I Thought It Was Hilarious. But Nobody Else At That Age Really Did. It Was Genuinely Weird

When I Dance, I Look Like I'm A Dad At A Prom. I Never Grasped My Limbs. Ever Since Puberty I've Just Kind Of Felt Like We Don't Understand Each Other.