We Got The Hot Fudge

Men Don't Care What's On Tv. They Only Care What Else Is On Tv.

A Movie Is Kind Of Like Being The Captain Of A Ship, Which Is Nice, But When I Perform By Myself It's Just Surfing On The Water And Nobody Really Knows What Happens.

You Know You're Getting Old When You Get That One Candle On The Cake. It's Like, 'see If You Can Blow This Out.'

People Who Read The Tabloids Deserve To Be Lied To.

And I'll Tell Ya, I'm Really Enjoying This Marriage Thing. You Think About Each Other. You Care About Each Other. It's Wonderful! Plus, I Love Saying 'my Wife.' Once I Started Saying It, I Couldn't Stop - 'my Wife' This, 'my Wife' That...it's An Amazing Way To Begin A Sentence.