Nothing Makes A Man Feel

What Is To Be Done With People Who Can't Read A Sunday Paper Without Messing It All Up?... Show Me A Sunday Paper Which Has Been Left In A Condition Fit Only For Kite Flying, And I Will Show You An Antisocial And Dangerous Character Who Has Left It That Way.

I Can't Bring Myself To Say, 'well, I Guess I'll Be Toddling Along.' It Isn't That I Can't Toddle. It's Just That I Can't Guess I'll Toddle.

It Took Me Fifteen Years To Discover I Had No Talent For Writing, But I Couldn't Give It Up Because By That Time I Was Too Famous.

She Sleeps Alone At Last.

The Knocking Out Of A Pipe Can Be Made Almost As Important As The Smoking Of It, Especially If There Are Nervous People In The Room. A Good, Smart Knock Of A Pipe Against A Tin Wastebasket And You Will Have A Neurasthenic Out Of His Chair And Into The Window Sash In No Time.