The Help (in Japan) Is

You Know You've Reached Middle Age When Your Weightlifting Consists Merely Of Standing Up.

Golf Is A Hard Game To Figure. One Day You Will Go Out And Slice It And Shank It, Hit Into All The Traps And Miss Every Green. The Next Day You Go Out And, For No Reason At All, You Really Stink.

I Felt I Wasn't Getting Anywhere In England.

The Last Time I Played Golf With President Ford He Hit A Birdie. And An Eagle, A Moose, An Elk, An Aardvark...

I Can Still Chase Women, Only Downhill