The Customer’s Always Right.

I Like To Smoke A Pipe, Because It's The Punch Line Indicator. Whenever I Take A Hit Of The Pipe, You Should Be Laughing.

I Saw This Wino, He Was Eating Grapes. I Was Like, "dude, You Have To Wait".

I Went To The Airport, I Put My Bag In The X-ray Machine, I Found Out My Bag Has Cancer. It Only Has Six More Months To Hold Stuff.

I Wish I Could Play Little League Now. I'd Be Way Better Than Before.

If You Drink O'douls, You Don't Drink; But If You Drink 20 O'douls In A Half Hour, Then You're A Non-alcoholic.