People Ask If I Can

I'll Tell Ya, I Don't Get No Respect... The Other Day, I Got Back From A Business Trip. I Got In A Cab And Said To The Driver, "hey! Take Me To Where The Action Is!" So Ya Know Where He Took Me? He Took Me To My House!

With My Old Man I Got No Respect. He Told Me Never Take Candy From A Stranger Unless He Offered Me A Ride.

I Asked My Wife, 'is There Somebody Else?' She Said, 'there Must Be.'

My Wife Has To Be The Worst Cook. In My House, We Pray After We Eat.

If It Wasn't For Pick-pockets I'd Have No Sex Life At All.