One Of The First Things

I'm Very Open To The Up-and-comers.

Well, If You’re A Native Chicagoan, You Know How Dumb He [dr. Robert Hartley] Is. He Gets On The Ravenswood El, He Goes Past His Stop On Sheridan Road, He Gets Off In Evanston, Where The El Is On The Ground, And Then He Walks Back 55 Blocks To His Apartment. Now, Would You Want To Have That Man As A Psychologist? A Man Who Misses His Stop Every Day?

I'm One Of Those Passengers Who Arrives At The Airport Five Or Six Hours Early So I Can Throw Back A Few Drinks And Muster Up The Courage To Board The Plane. Apparently I'm Not Alone Because I've Never Been In An Empty Airport Bar. I Don't Care What Time You Get There. Even At 8:00 A.m. You Have To Fight Your Way To The Bar. At That Hour, Everyone Drinks Bloody Marys So No One Can Tell It's Booze- At Least Until They Fall Off Their Chair.

I Think One Reason For A Successful Marriage Is Laughter. I Think Laughter Gets You Through The Rough Moments In A Marriage.

I Really Don't Know What Makes A Comedian. I Think It's A Family Background And Environment. Yet If You Put The Same Ingredients In Another Person, He May Never Utter A Funny Line.