On Christmas Day You Can't

The Lord's Our Shepherd, Says The Psalm. But Just In Case, We Better Get A Bomb.

In One Word He Told Me The Secret Of Success In Mathematics: Plagiarize; Only Be Sure Always To Call It . . . Research.

Oh, The Protestants Hate The Catholics/ And The Catholics Hate The Protestants/ And The Hindus Hate The Muslims/ And Everybody Hates The Jews.

Once You've Heard The Joke, It's Not Funny Anymore, But It's The Way It's Told. And I Think That's The Same With The Music: The Reason Some Of My Songs Have Lasted Longer Is There's A Lot Of Stuff Packed In There. You Want To Hear Them More Than Once.

I Don't Have The Temperament Of A Performer, And I Certainly Couldn't Do It Every Night.