Ninety-seven Saint Days A Year

You Made One Mistake. You Married Me.

I Think Weddings Are Sadder Than Funerals, Because They Remind You Of Your Own Wedding. You Can't Be Reminded Of Your Own Funeral Because It Hasn't Happened. But Weddings Always Make Me Cry.

A Pedestrian Ought To Be Legally Allowed To Toss At Least One Hand Grenade At A Motorist Every Day.

Many A Man Has Decided To Stay Alive Not Because Of The Will To Live But Because Of The Determination Not To Give Assorted Surviving Bastards The Satisfaction Of His Death.

All Publicity Is Good, Except An Obituary Notice.