Ninety Percent Of All Prisoners

My Best Friend Is Disabled. There's Nothing He Hates More Than Being Left Out Of The Jokes, To Be Treated With Kid Gloves. That's The Insult.

You Have Such A Huge Career ... Behind You.

With Everybody Having A Facebook And A Twitter, I Feel Like Regular People Consider Themselves Stars. It's A Live, Real-time Upload Of Every Time We Buy A Pair Of Socks, The Most Telling Sign That We're Losing Our Politeness. When You Know Everything About Somebody, You Can Talk To Them Any Way You Please.

Instead Of Running For President, Why Don’t You Try Walking On A Treadmill?

The Real Question Is How Do You Stay Funny In Your 70s And 80s? And That's A Real Accomplishment, You Know, The Longevity.