My Sophomore Year I Spent

I Was Not A Jock In High School. I Know, You're Shocked.

Irony Is The Disparity Between What You Expect Will Happen, And What Does Happen. So Raining On Your Wedding Day Isn't Ironic, It's Just Crappy. It Would Have Been Ironic If She Had Lived In A Place Like Seattle, And Traveled To The Desert Of Mexico For A Wedding And It Ended Up Raining There, But Not In Seattle. Alanis Always Gets The Last Laugh Though. We All Sit Here, Saying Her Song Isn't Ironic, But In Fact, That's Pretty Ironic That She Wrote A Song Called Ironic That Wasn't Really Ironic. Those Canadians Are Pretty Crafty.

I Know A Lot About A Few Things - Mostly Useless Things.

I Mean, You're Gonna Be Left Behind If You Don't Appreciate The Genius That Is Meredith Vieira.

A Young Imagination Is Bold, Likes To Make Bigger Leaps. It Likes To, Well, Imagine That The Dustbuster Is A Dinosaur; That The Computer Mouse Is A Hotrod; That The Box Is A Cave; That The Rawhide Is A Torch... Or A Baton... Or Something.