Most People Don't Know How

Everyone Should Have An Evil Secret Plan.

My Wife And I Were Poor When I Started But We Struggled Along Until Things Happened For Me In My Thirties. I Knew I Was Doing What I Loved Even If I Wasn't Getting Paid For It, So I Think I'd Still Be Doing It.

My Charity Is In The Business Of Helping Firefighters In Any Way That We Can. For Instance, After 9/11 We Were The Second-fastest Charity To Raise And Distribute Money To The Widows And Surviving Family Members Of The 343 Firefighters Who Died That Day.

There Is A Huge Boom In Autism Right Now Because Inattentive Mothers And Competitive Dads Want An Explanation For Why Their Dumb-ass Kids Can't Compete Academically, So They Throw Money Into The Happy Laps Of Shrinks . . . To Get Back Diagnoses That Help Explain Away The Deficiencies Of Their Junior Morons. I Don't Give A [bleep] What These Crackerjack Whack Jobs Tell You - Yer Kid Is Not Autistic. He's Just Stupid. Or Lazy. Or Both.

Racism Isn't Born, Folks, It's Taught. I Have A Two-year-old Son. You Know What He Hates? Naps! End Of List.