Life's A Short Trip. You'll

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. When I Went On The Roller Coaster, My Old Man Told Me To Stand Up Straight.

I Stuck My Head Out The Window And Got Arrested For Mooning.

When I Was A Kid, I Never Went To Disneyland. My Ol' Man Told Me Mickey Mouse Died In A Cancer Experiment.

She Was So Ugly That I Took Her To A Dog Show And She Won First Prize.

It Was The Same Thing In The Army, No Respect. They Gave Me A Uniform That Glowed In The Dark.