Know My Feelings About Traffic

I Didn't Wash Today. I Wasn't Dirty. If I'm Not Dirty, I Don't Wash. Some Weeks I Don't Have To Shower At All. I Just Groom My Three Basic Areas: Teeth, Hair, And Asshole. And To Save Time, I Use The Same Brush.

The Older I Got, The More Apparent It Became That My Mother Was Losing Control Over Me. She Fought Back Fiercely With Black Moods, Silent Treatments And Martyrdom. And, Of Course, All She Did Was Run My Ass Out Of The House Even Quicker. The Pressure Was Unbearable.

Put Two Things Together Which Have Never Been Put Together Before, And Some Schmuck Will Buy It.

Christian Deodorant: "thou Shalt Not Smell"

I’m A High-tech Low-life. A Cutting Edge, State-of-the-art Bi-coastal Multi-tasker And I Can Give You A Gigabyte In A Nanosecond!