John Cleese Once Told Me

I Hate Movies. They're So Boring. So Tedious.

I Won't Read Scripts Because I Have A Limited Amount Of Time. Why Should I Help Other People Do Lame Stuff When I Can Just Go Out And Put On Lame Stuff Of My Own?

I Don't Necessarily Know Much About Comedy, I Don't Spend A Lot Of Time Watching It. Mainly Because All My Life For About 50 Years I've Had Comedy.

A Lot Has Been Said About Politics; Some Of It Complimentary, But Most Of It Accurate

At Cambridge, You Have To Kiss The Vice-chancellor's Fingers. But I Missed Out On That, 'cause I Was Doing A Matinee. I Don't Want To Kiss A Strange Man's Fingers Anyway.