I've Learned That You Can't

It's Amazing Where A Joke Might Come From. I Find A Lot Of Humour Just By Metaphorically Turning Things Upside Down Or Literally Like My Wife's Cat.

I Don't Know How Electricity Works. All I Know Is That It Calms Me.

I Asked God For A Bike, But I Know God Doesn't Work That Way. So I Stole A Bike And Asked For Forgiveness.

The Question Is Absurd: When You Ask, 'if God Is Both All Good And All Powerful, Why Then Does He Allow Suffering?', What You Are Really Asking Is, 'if God Is Both All Good And All Powerful, Why Then Can He Not Make Me (the Questioner) - Who Is Just As Much A Part Of A Universe In Which There Is Suffering As Is Any Other Part - Be At The Same Time The Exact Same Questioner, But One Who Is Now Part And Parcel Of A Universe In Which There Is No Suffering?' Which, Reduced Down, Is The Same Thing As Asking, 'why Can There Not Be, At The Same Time, X And The Preclusion Of X?'

You Should Get Married. When I Was Younger, I Was Into The Fame And Fortune, And Now I Realize That A Loving Wife And Happy Children - That's Life's Greatest Consolation Prize.