It's Cool To Be Healthy.

We Thought I Was Going To Be A Great Athlete, And We Were Wrong, And I Thought I Was Going To Be A Great Entertainer, And That Wasn't It Either. I'm Going To Be An American Citizen. First Class.

Everything We Do We Should Look At In Terms Of Millions Of People Who Can't Afford It.

The Funniest Jokes You Know Aren't From Comics But Relatives, Friends - From Your Life. That's The Funniest Stuff.

White Folks Are The Luckiest People: Finally A Black President And He's A Behaved One. Went To The Best Schools, Best Colleges, Never Raises His Voice. I Ran For President In 1968. I Tell (audiences) If I Won, I Would Have Dug Up The Rose Garden And Planted Watermelon!

The Jelly-bean Eating Thug Says That National Defense Is Important. But National Defense Starts At Home.