It Really Bothers Me When

My Parents, Grandparents, Aunts And Uncles Were All Funny, And I Felt That Energy, That Delivery, That Timing, That Sarcasm. All That Stuff Seeped Into My Brain.

Life Is Tough, And If We Don't Laugh, We're Going To - Our Head Will Explode.

Life Is Short. You Have To Be Able To Laugh At Our Pain Or We Never Move On.

With Everybody Having A Facebook And A Twitter, I Feel Like Regular People Consider Themselves Stars. It's A Live, Real-time Upload Of Every Time We Buy A Pair Of Socks, The Most Telling Sign That We're Losing Our Politeness. When You Know Everything About Somebody, You Can Talk To Them Any Way You Please.

I Usually Have Sex To My Stand-up Comedy Album. Power Move.