It Is Difficult To Be

The Landlady Of A Boarding-house Is A Parallelogram - That Is, An Oblong Angular Figure, Which Cannot Be Described, But Which Is Equal To Anything

You Frequently Ask, Where Are The Friends Of Your Childhood, And Urge That They Shall Be Brought Back To You. As Far As I Am Able To Learn, Those Of Your Friends Who Are Not In Jail Are Still Right There In Your Native Village. You Point Out That They Were Wont To Share Your Gambols, If So, You Are Certainly Entitled To Have Theirs Now.

A Lone Maple Leaf Resting On Sand Have You Ever Been Out For A Late Autumn Walk In The Closing Part Of The Afternoon, And Suddenly Looked Up To Realize That The Leaves Have Practically All Gone? And The Sun Has Set And The Day Gone Before You Knew It, And With That A Cold Wind Blows Across The Landscape? That's Retirement.

A Sportsman Is A Man Who, Every Now And Then, Simply Has To Get Out And Kill Something.

It Is Difficult To Be Funny And Great At The Same Time. Aristophanes And Moliere And Mark Twain Must Sit Below Aristotle And Bossuet And Emerson.