In The Land Of The

The Point Is, How Do You Know The Guarantee Fairy Isn't A Crazy Glue Sniffer.

People Need A Time To Laugh. It's Up To Us To Bonk Ourselves On The Head And Slip On A Banana Peel So The Average Guy Can Say, 'i May Be Bad, Honey, But I'm Not As Much Of An Idiot As That Guy On The Screen.'

I Can Get A Great Look At A T-bone Steak By Shoving My Head Up A Bull's Ass But I'd Rather Take The Butchers Word For It.

I Was In The Pritikin Center In Santa Monica Once, Trying To Lose 30 Or 40 Pounds In A Month. I'd Work... On A Treadmill And With The Weights, But It Was Driving Me Nuts. So I Escaped. Tom Arnold Picked Me Up And We Went To Le Dome And Had Tons Of Desserts.

I Live In A Van Down By The River.